Man in the Box!
Beautiful morning. It started the way it should. Until now that is…
Morning sarcasm
Morning worries
Morning hate
I wanted to talk about it. But there is no one who would actually ask me what is it? Forget about asking, I wonder if anyone actually noticed that I am sinking way below my usual level in front of this stupid monitor; wiping off occasional tear; which would break off the brim due to surface tension.
I have this huge question dangling inside my head for one whole month now. Do I have any right to decide someone’s fate by force of argument and emotions; just because they made a mistake in their life and stumbled down.
Does that relation by blood, give me right enough to make decisions of their life for them even when they don’t want me to? Am I qualified enough to call them immature? Am I going to do what I really think I should do; or am I going to give into conventional thinking, forced upon me by orthodox herd itself.
I just wished if my dad was alright today, I wouldn’t be breaking into pieces of rusted glass under immense pressure. If he was there by my side, like he was 14-15 years back, probably I wouldn’t have to go through this trauma of choosing between right and wrong; when both looks right from their perspective.
I want a break from all this. And apparently, when I tried to take one; I have been questioned. Maybe rightfully. Maybe Not. Even though it’s my parents who questioned me; I am not ashamed to say that I hate all of them. For every second of my life I wish, we all would just get along be there for each other, instead of playing mind games with each other against each other.
I FUCKING HATE YOU ALL!! I hate this life and I hate this world. Over and Over again to hate once again!
Oh god.. am down on my knees and day hasn’t even started.
Sometimes, I feel maybe I should just break away the chains. Guess, that is exactly how people get pushed over the edge.
Here is the song dedicated to this fucking stupid day!
Alice in Chains - "Man In The Box"
Im the man in the box
Buried in my shit
Wont you come and save me, save me
Feed my eyes, can you sew them shut?
Jesus christ, deny your maker
He who tries, will be wasted
Feed my eyes now youve sewn them shut
Im the dog who gets beat
Shove my nose in shit
Wont you come and save me, save me